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it just gets hard to believe

i finally understand how milton feels. my stapler at work disappeared the other day. it’s possible that i have hidden it from myself under something on my desk, but i haven’t found it yet. i didn’t know i was attached to that stapler until i was given a replacement made out of plastic. now i miss my nice heavy metal one. i’m not going to burn anything down or anything though.
i also realized today that since i started working here, i covet big paperclips. i am no longer interested in the little ones coated in colored something, even in the pink ones. and i’ve never liked the plastic triangular ones. i only want big shiny silver ones, and i only use them to paperclip things that i know are coming back to me. i never put them on things that i’m never going to see again, because then i’d lose the paperclips. how did this happen? when did i become a paperclip hoarder?

(song: “miami,” counting crows)

10 comments to it just gets hard to believe

  • OMG, I am also all about the JUMBO paperclips!! That’s all I use. Any time I get something with a small clip I get rid of it and put a nice shiny JUMBO clip on. I do not hoard them though, there is not a shortage of them since I think I’m the only one who is a JUMBO clip snob in the office. I use them on everything!

  • shelby

    OMG, you guys crake me up. =) Jumbo clip-lovers!

  • Andi

    My supervisor has these special,special spiral paper clips. Everytime she gives me things clipped with them I am shocked at her foolishness- because clearly I will never return the lovely spiral!

  • robin

    I *also* love big paper clips! In fact, I have two paper clip receptacles on my desk! One is for the small paper clips coated in colored plastic. I use these when I am giving someone something for good and have no expectation that the clip will return to me. The other paper clip box (you know, the kind with the magnetized hole at the top) contains the large shiny metal variety. I am v stingy with them.

    Also, re: the special spiral paper clips, I love those too! We don’t have them in our office supply room, *but* I often receive them in the mail from unscrupulous people who seem to think that discarding such fabulous office supplies is par for the course.

  • shebly

    Wow, I really need to get with the program. I suppose my problem is that I avoid anything in hard-copy like the plague. I am an electronic-copy-only person, all the way. Foolish? Probably.
    I have never seen spiral paperclips, but they sound almost fabulous enough to entice me to experiment with using paper. =)

  • yay, i’m not alone!
    spirals.
    i, too, like these, as well as some weird paperclips that i got at work at archives in eugene when i was processing a collection from the late 1800s-early 1900s. i think. maybe the 20s. i’m not sure. in any case it had good paperclips, so i took them. some round ones, but not spirals, and some fun rectangular ones with curly things in the middle. hard to explain.

  • I like spiral paper clips, too. But no one at work uses them. So mostly paper clips just annoy me, because all my budgets come paper-clipped, and I have no use for paper clips but I don’t want to throw them away, so they’re just scattered all over my desk.

  • you need to be very careful hoarding paper clips… they are like ova… only a finite number of them are produced At The Very Beginning and no more are produced ever again! all of the paper clips in existance today were produced in a small british factory several years into the industrial revolution. no new paper clips are produced anymore; they just get passed on and recycled from user to user. discarded paper clips are collected by thieves and then repacked and resold. so if you start hoarding them, the world will eventually run out of paper clips. chaos will ensue.

    resist the urge to hoarde all of your paper clips! for the sake of all that is orderly and cubiclized, let some venture forth into the public domain to be used by the rest of us!

  • tom, only you could get away with a sentence like “[paperclips] are like ova.” this makes me happy to know you.

  • and

    I wish I knew Tom! Or do I? Ova!

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