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i am a visitor here … i am not permanent

it has come to my attention that i have been lacking in my detailing my mother’s love life. i mentioned that she’ll be moving out in two years and that i’d like to move in. i didn’t explain why. so here is the answer:
she is getting married.
again.
background story: i don’t remember my parents ever being together; they divorced when i was about two. my first stepdad was nice and worked for hewlett-packard, but he died when i was four or five, i think. my second stepdad is my sister’s dad. i don’t really remember a whole lot about them being together except that he had a big scary red dog and no hair. my third stepdad potentially has OCD. he thinks mom was the controlling, scary, yelly one, and he blames her for that and for emotionally abusing him (and, peripherally, me and my sister, but he is much more interested in himself), but he doesn’t realize that it got about fifty times worse as soon as he moved in. pretty much the only positive memory i have of him is when he took me to get my ears pierced when i was thirteen. it was against mom’s rule of having to be sixteen, but i think it was a planned “rebelling” to get me to like him. they just got divorced about a year and a half ago.
so counting the one before my dad, right after high school, which lasted somewhere between six weeks and six months, and which i didn’t know about until i was about ten, that makes five marriages total. and now it will be six. she is not quite fifty years old. i feel that this has messed both her and me up in a not insignificant way.
the plan is for her to move in with the new guy in a different town a couple of hours away when my sister goes to college. i was worried that this meant that she would try to sell the portland house, which i want desperately, but she says she won’t. i told her if she wants to sell it, she has to wait until i can buy it from her. then when he retires (he’s a podiatrist!) in ten years, they will buy a farm somewhere in washington. with chickens.
i am really excited about the chickens. i am slightly apprehensive, but more approving than i was of the last guy, of the podiatrist. he has grandkids so i am totally off the hook now for reproducing, which pleases me. i think he essentially asked for my blessing the other day, and i clapped my hands and said yay. so i guess i think it’s all right.
plus it lets me fantasize about the house without the pesky problem of how i got ahold of it. a fantasy isn’t as much fun if your mom has to die in it to make it possible.

(song: “the district sleeps alone tonight,” the postal service.)

5 comments to i am a visitor here … i am not permanent

  • Leigh

    Best of luck to your mother. I see her every once in a while when she passes by the big windows of the Bagdad. :) I’m very excited about the fact that you and I will be living in the same city again. How long has it been since that was the case? 1994, I believe?

  • Andi

    I was just thinking, “Hmmmm… I really feel out of the loops when it comes to Luaren’s mom’s love life.”

  • i totally knew you were! that’s why i posted this! ‘cos you were all wondering!

  • Actually, you posted this because *I* was wondering. And nosy. Ha.

  • #4

    i wish i knew what to say (i guess i am speechless) but on the other hand i also think i knew it was certain to happensoon, if not later.

    i don’t judge her for her relentless search for love. too bad it has to be the ‘trial and error’ system.

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